KECHKI MAACH ER PEYAZ CHOCCHORI O BHAJA

I am starting off late again and I have a lot of work to do today after finishing off with the Blog Post. Thursday & Friday requires me to stock the pantry and prepare for the weekend. The senior got very restrictive with food, never has snacks unless there are guests and starters are as good as a mutton shami kebab or a chicken tangri kebab, okay paneer appetisers too he has but "paneer er dalna?" He just eats, never with love. My plans of making paneer at home is not happening, I must go out today to get fresh milk which is a requirement, tetra pack milk does not curdle well. Yesterday too, I did not buy paneer packets from the Indian store, so determined I am to prepare a batch of it at home. I and the son so love it, who will prepare and feed "paneer er dalna to kebab" to my boy in a distant land? These thoughts are killing me. Then, I have to allow him go. I see my mother saying her son has problem with eating if she stays for a week in our Kolkata home. "Tui janishna B ke onek shokale berotey hoy, amar cheleta duto luchi kheye office jai, maach-bhaat ba biryani niye jai." What they think of me I do not know, I cannot stay quiet; "tomar jonyo o atkey gelo; tumi mukhey bolecho eer chele, oor meye kothai pouchey gelo kintu mon thekey tumi okey kolchara kortey paroni. Amar bhetor fetey jacchey kintu ami atkabo na." If you say so, my brother's wife too is very much home bound in this matter, "didibhai, who will look after my parents?" I told her several times "with your teaching experience, you can earn way more in the financial capital of India and keep your parents in a better condition." My brother? "Didibhai, ami oshob oto bhara diye ooituku flat e thaktey parbona, pach bochor struggle koro torpor bhodrosto bhabey thako, dur." Leave that, they got stuck and their time to explore the new has gone. 

About my husband and son, they are focussed and yes, may lack good amount of emotion unlike me. That we enjoy staying at home together, that they enjoy the food prepared by me or have pleasure ordering it online; is a proof that we are a happy family. Who would look after us in future we do not know, my immensely independent man says we would go for assisted living. Does it mean we should accuse our son, isn't he fulfilling our dreams? For some genuine reasons I hate some emotionally charged, wrong kind of posts in social media. They are written to gain likes and popularity, some write those stuffs that can hit the emotion of the readers, on the same old topic of "bodhu nirjaton, nishiddho prem, swami-strir tanaporen; bazaarey katbey amon bishoy." Come on, we should not generalise things. Look at me; I prepared rice and semolina idli for the men's lunch boxes, I had them before they could reach their school & office. Are they bothered? I eat out more than them, no-one checks on my expenditures.

 The idli today was fluffier. I have made a big batch and already had three of them. We can blog about idli, paratha, etc. later, let us share something that gives me immense pleasure, heirloom Bengali recipes. This one is one such using a small variety of fish; Kechki Maach / Indian River Sprat. My family does a "maach er chocchori" this way without frying them whilst the man's home does it frying the fish and adding it to a number of vegetables cut in strips which I like too. At this home, the son has not learnt to eat a non-fried small fish variety, mumma feared of bones getting stuck in her love's throat, so half the amount brought has to be fried which he and all of us love. We call this non-vegetarian, small fish variety item KECHKI MAACH ER PEYAZ CHOCCHORI O BHAJA.

It feels I am not in the pink of health, never shall be because I eat wrong and sit all day. The only difference I have with my mother-in-law is that I do not crib all day about it and eat up other's heads. What I had seen very wrong in that home is all of them were indulgent about her wrongs. Since marriage, that is since 1997, I saw her sit all day and watch television or chat. She did not eat proper meals, neither maintained proper hygiene; days after days she did not take shower. No one at her home did try to mend her wrong habits. In fact, that is impossible; I never found her normal. Because my husband and son have inherited much of her temperament, I find them impossible to handle; they however inherited my father-in-law's brain matter! Had I have been my father-in-law's wife or mother; I would have fought to make him complete his studies. Had I be my husband's mother, I would have stopped him from leaving studies in the midway at any cost, he hardly listened to this wife, then a friend. Their family lives on medicine. I was telling my husband, "all three of you are responsible for your mother's this condition. A slight fever, a little of stomach ache, they will not wait but run to the doctor and get few medicines unnecessarily. She has zero resistance power. I am not talking about now, I say about the time I entered their home. They think medicine can cure all, it worsened her. 

I suffer from consitpated bowel movement since childhood; post marriage till last year there was a growth that bled. I never bothered my husband, only feared cancerous cells growing. What I did was starting to have warm lemon water and Indrajav soaked in water every morning. By God's grace, the swelling vanished. The husband's family cannot think of this. They will try the best doctors in Kolkata, go for surgery in the first month. For two-three years now, the left side of my neck to the shoulder and half of the back pains way too much, may be because I carry a heavy bag on my left. I did not even ask the husband to take me to a specialist, get physiotherapy done, this that. When things go out of control; we shall see. This guy is overburdened since age 20. I tell him "as a son your job would have been to get a good home in a decent neighbourhood or a flat in a proper condominium, a tiny Alto or Zen car for your parents. Instead you guys helped the doctors to build their's." His family could not guarantee him a normal life for themselves, so he could not because he has to bear a huge medical expenses and he is not a business tycoon. His mother made no effort to remain well and normal! I can call them every alternate day, I do not. "S, her stomach is aching." Come on, if one sits all day and gulp ten variety of medicines, there shall be wind formed in the stomach. I do not say anything, from day one I am the worst kind of a daughter-in-law who keeps their son in her pocket. If you come here, visit other homes and compare it with our's; you will know whether I have control over my husband's finances or not. I keep telling him "your parents are not supposed to live in that stupid, impoverished condominium, they deserved better. Your mother's grudge on me would have been halved if she stayed in an air lit, proper flat; owned a car & a part-time driver." Then they cannot maintain their small flat, they could not guarantee that they will at least try to live better and happy without wanting medication for every little thing. I tell their son that he made all the wrong expenditures. Had he  got them a proper home, had I decorated that with flowering pots; then what? They would not have taken care of anything, but would sit all day and talk about diseases. If I get them in our empty house in Kolkata; I shall be in prison on my visits to Kolkata. For two weeks I have to sit with them and be their guard. They will not let me go out for shopping, to meet people. I never had serious issues living with my paa-in-law though I do not like the patriarch in him or his bitter tone but he is too duty bound. What did his wife do? She spoke negative about me in the neighbourhood, made my so called "friendly circle" enjoy the sweet and sour gossips, tore me in front of the cook who fleeced her complaining about me. When questioned, she would flatly deny; she is sick and old; I am not. I got to hear how bad I am, what kind of a "jinish" I am, how great her daughter is, how hardworking compared to me who is a lazy brat. If I was so lazy, how could my mother-in-law sleep all day and watch television during the years they stayed with me? I had only one help then. So, our home, specially our helps and neighbours had to be different.

 I could never think of my mother-in-law serving me food, having which I could go out to enjoy a movie or adda with my friends. I keep a cordial, formal relationship with her daughter and the daughter's husband who talked at my back to keep his mother-in-law happy, I believe the daughter did not. It is true she hates cooking, neither she is cordial with her in-laws [thats her personal issue] but she earns & supports her family and is an amazing home maker. Anyway, they are all family, no one can ever accuse me saying that I did not want to serve them good food of their kind! So, here are non-vegetarian, fish dishes family kind of with Kechki / Indian River Sprat they and any primitive Bengali would enjoy; "KECHKI MAACH ER PEYAZ CHOCCHORI O BHAJA."

INGREDIENTS FOR THE FISH-ONION-GARLIC-CHILLI PREPARATION :

KECHKI MAACH / INDIAN RIVER SPRAT : 250-300GM

SLITTED GREEN CHILLI : 4-5

CRUSHED GARLIC : 1TBSP

SLICED ONION : 1SMALL TEA CUP

RED CHILLI POWDER : 1/2TSP

TURMERIC POWDER : 1/4TSP

SALT : AS REQUIRED

NIGELLA SEED / KALOJEEREY : 1/4TSP

OIL : 1TBSP +2TBSP

INGREDIENTS FOR THE DEEP FRIED FISH:

KECHKI MAACH / INDIAN RIVER SPRAT : 300-400GM 

REFINED FLOUR OR RICE FLOUR : 2TSP

TURMERIC POWDER : 1/4TSP

SALT : AS REQUIRED

OIL : AS REQUIRED TO DEEP FRY CRISP

PROCEDURE :

LET US PREPARE THE "KECHKI WITH ONION-GARLIC-CHILLI" AT FIRST.

Wash the fish taking in a bowl several times as there may be mud, dirt and grass a lot. The good news is we need not clean their stomach, gills, scales.

Drain the water, marinate the fish well with 2tbsp oil, turmeric powder, salt, red chilli powder, washed sliced onion, slitted green chillies. Mix well and keep aside for 40-45 minutes.

Heat oil in a wok very well, temper with crushed garlic and nigella seeds. As the garlic turns brown, add the fish along with the marinade and fold in well gently.

We shall cover cook it at the minimal heat for 12-14 minutes, stirring it quite gently every few minutes without allowing all of the fish to break. This is the only trick.

Water shall release, when it dries we are done. If required, we can sprinkle water little by little after a pause.

FOR THE "KECHKI MAACH BHAJA", THIS IS WHAT WE DO.

Wash the fish taking in a bowl several time to get rid of the grass, mud and other dust particles.

Drain the water and marinate it with the turmeric and salt.

After 1/2 an hour, drain the marinade and add the rice flour or refined flour. Mix well.

Heat the oil to the smoking point and then bring it to the lowest. Add the fish in batches and deep fry till crisp. During the entire period, we have to adjust the heat from low to the minimal.

We should have both the dishes with only steamed rice. The fried fish can be had as a snacks with your choice of drinks.